Where it all began

A small town called Amherstburg, ON – 45 min south of Windsor, Ontario, is where I grew up.  I was so lucky to call a beautiful place on the Detroit River opening to Lake Erie “home”.  Our home was located in a small village, just off the lake. Life was simpler and quieter then.

The first several years of my life, only speaking "en français" (French) not only was it a special gift but in time proved to bring me challenges which led to my crippling shyness. Not being able to make friends easily meant I lived in a rather small world.  That being said, I spent a lot of time with my maman (mom). While I didn't know it at the time, she has been one of my biggest inspirations.

From an early age, I felt my life was pre-determined.  Grow up, marry a man that works at one of the "BIG 3" car manufacturers (Chrysler, Ford or GM) and have babies.  That's it!  My shyness didn't allow me to think or dare dream beyond that. As time went on through my high school years, my shyness continued, but I started to notice a curiosity growing inside of me. The need and desire for change. I didn't know then what it meant, but I knew that the "intended" path may not be what I wanted.

My small town childhood came with societal pressures to do "what you are supposed to" or what is "expected of you." There isn't much grace for creating your own path. If you dared to be different, you were immediately presented with doubt and "You can't do that" or "That's dumb." This is probably no different in any other size of town.

Back then, I found myself quieting my inner voice for change and simply following along.  I didn’t grow up with a strong desire to seek the traditional post-secondary school University path.  My grades were OK but not what I would consider to be “good enough” to get into University.  On top of that, the thought of being in a large auditorium style classroom terrified me.  Campus life seemed very overwhelming both from an academic and social aspect for such a timid person.  As a child, I never found myself dreaming of “When I grow up, I want to be “XXX”.  That just didn’t seem to be a topic of conversation in my house.  The majority of my family didn’t go to university, so I wasn't exposed to that as a possibility.  Our family comes from a long line of hard working people, mostly working “blue collar” jobs.  Near the end of my high school days, I was working as a nanny and housekeeper. I knew this wasn’t going to be a career path I wanted for myself.  When thinking about what would come next, I remember my mom sharing her life story which included becoming an esthetician prior to her life as a pastry chef.  I became curious about this as I had enjoyed doing nails for friends and giving myself facials at home.  One day, when talking to my aunt Sue about possibly becoming an esthetician, she shared with me that St. Clair College (where she worked) had a good esthetic program.  I was nervous about attending school full time but learned that they offered part-time night school.  Only 2 classes per week—How perfect! This felt much more manageable. It allowed me to “dip my toe” into grown up school life.  I lived at home while continuing to work as a nanny & housekeeper.  It would take me 1.5 years to complete my esthetic program.  

My first job as an esthetician was in my home town at a small spa that specialized in body sugaring.  I was excited to learn a specialty and it turns out I was really good at it.  My personal life was as expected.  I was dating guys destined for the Big 3 and was seeing my life becoming what everyone else around me was doing. Now, don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with getting married and having babies, but I somehow knew this wasn’t the life for me.  I was numb to the idea of this existence. Through my journey as an esthetician, I learned many things, but most importantly I was gaining confidence in a skill and my shyness was slowly fading away.  I was gaining a reputation for my manicures and pedicures as I was very meticulous. My body sugaring clientele was increasing and my clients often commented that I had a gentle touch-which as you can imagine is rather important when getting your hair ripped out!  I always focused on the client experience.  What else can I do to make their treatments more enjoyable?  Adding a nicely scented candle?  Quiet spa music?  I slowly noticed that my timidness and being a little bit quiet, meant that I held space for my client to shine.  The appointments weren’t about me and my life–they were about my client!  This is when I started to feel a shift within me that perhaps my shyness was becoming a super power (while I didn’t see it as that at the time).  My shyness meant that I listened more. 

In time, my clientele grew to a point where I became busier than everyone else in the spa.  I quietly felt proud of that.